Customary Marriage in South Africa: How to Register It and What It Means Legally

Customary marriages are full, legal marriages in South Africa. Since the Recognition of Customary Marriages Act came into force on 15 November 2000, a marriage concluded under African customary law carries the same legal weight as a church or Home Affairs wedding. It just gets there by a different road, through lobola talks, family delegations and the welcoming of the bride, rather than a marriage officer and a signed register.

That different road is exactly why couples get confused. When does the marriage actually start? Do you have to register it? What happens to your house, your pension and your children if you don't? And can you still have a white wedding afterwards?

This guide answers those questions in plain language, from the Act itself, the Department of Home Affairs and the court judgments that have shaped the law. It is general information, not legal advice. If your situation is complicated, a family law attorney is worth the consultation fee.

What a customary marriage is in South African law

The Recognition of Customary Marriages Act 120 of 1998 defines customary law as the customs and usages traditionally observed among the indigenous African peoples of South Africa. A customary marriage is one concluded under those customs, whether Zulu, Xhosa, Sotho, Tswana, Pedi, Venda, Tsonga, Ndebele or Swazi. Marriages under Hindu, Muslim or other religious rites are not customary marriages under this Act. They are handled separately.

Two things make this Act important. It recognised customary marriages that already existed before it started, so a couple married by custom in 1985 is legally married today. And it put wives on an equal footing with husbands, with full legal capacity to own property, sign contracts and go to court in their own name.

If you want the cultural side first, our guide to traditional weddings in South Africa walks through the ceremonies of each culture, and our step-by-step guide to a traditional Zulu wedding covers lobola through to umabo day.

What makes a customary marriage valid

Section 3 of the Act sets out the requirements for a customary marriage concluded after 15 November 2000. There are three.

1. Both of you must be 18 or older. The Act has a route for minors with parental consent, but it is a narrow one, and the proposed Marriage Bill would set 18 as an absolute minimum.
2. Both of you must consent. Your families negotiate, but the marriage is yours. Neither of you can be married off against your will.
3. The marriage must be negotiated and entered into or celebrated according to customary law. This is the part with real substance, and it depends on the customs of your families.

Lobola and the negotiations

In most communities, the negotiation is where it starts. The groom's family sends delegates, a lobola amount is agreed, and the families record the agreement, often in a letter signed by both sides. Lobola is not a strict legal requirement in the Act's wording, but in practice it is the clearest evidence that a marriage was negotiated under custom, and Home Affairs asks for the lobola agreement when you register. Our lobola guide for South Africa covers the letters, the delegations and what families typically agree on today.

The handing over and integration of the bride

Traditionally, the marriage is completed when the bride is handed over to, and welcomed into, the groom's family. This is the part courts have argued about most. In Mbungela v Mkabi (2019) and Tsambo v Sengadi (2020), the Supreme Court of Appeal held that the formal handing over is important but not indispensable. Customs evolve, families can waive or shorten rituals, and where the couple and both families clearly treated the union as a marriage, a missing ceremony did not undo it.

Not every scholar agrees with those judgments, and each case turns on its facts. The practical lesson is simple. Don't rely on half-finished rituals. If the families have agreed the marriage, complete the welcoming in whatever form your custom takes, and then register it.

Who cannot marry

Customary marriages between people who are too closely related by blood or by marriage are prohibited, following the rules of your customary law. And a person already in a civil marriage cannot enter into a customary marriage with anyone at all.

How to register a customary marriage at Home Affairs

Registration is the step most couples put off, and it is the one that saves the most heartache later. The Act places a duty on both spouses to register the marriage. Either of you can apply, and it is a single visit when you arrive with the right people and papers.

Registration is not what makes you married

Section 4(9) of the Act is clear. Failing to register a customary marriage does not affect its validity. If the requirements above were met, you are married, certificate or not. But without the certificate, you may have to prove the marriage to a pension fund, a bank, the Master of the High Court or an estranged in-law, often at the worst possible moment. Registration turns a disputed fact into a document.

The deadline

The Act requires a customary marriage concluded after 15 November 2000 to be registered within three months of the marriage, or within a longer period the Minister of Home Affairs sets by notice in the Government Gazette. In September 2024 the Minister used that power to open a two-year window, running to 31 August 2026, for older and late marriages to be registered. That window has now closed, but Home Affairs has said it will not turn couples away who come in after it. Late registration takes more evidence and an explanation of why you didn't register sooner, so the three-month rule is still the one to aim for.

Where to register

You can register at any Home Affairs office. In areas where there is no office nearby, a traditional leader who has been designated as a registering officer can take the application. Ask your local office first, since not every area has a designated leader.

Who must attend

According to the Department of Home Affairs, the following people should come in together.

• Both spouses, with their identity documents and copies.
• At least one witness from the bride's family.
• At least one witness from the groom's family, and/or a representative of each family.
• If either spouse was a minor at the time, their parents or guardians.

If one spouse has died, the surviving spouse can register the marriage on their own, with the family witnesses.

What to bring

• Valid South African IDs for both spouses, plus copies. Home Affairs checks these against the National Population Register.
• Certified copies of the IDs of the two family representatives.
• A sworn affidavit from each family representative, commissioned at the police station, confirming the details of the marriage celebration and that they attended.
• The lobola agreement, if there is one.
• Any other proof that customary negotiations and celebrations took place, such as photographs or letters between the families.
• For a late registration, a written explanation of why you are registering now.

You complete the application form (DHA-1699) at the office. The registering officer interviews you and the witnesses and, once satisfied that a valid customary marriage was concluded, records your identities, the date of the marriage, the lobola agreed and the other prescribed details.

What it costs

Very little. The Home Affairs tariff schedule lists no fee for the certificate issued when a marriage is registered, and the first abridged marriage certificate is free. Reprints and unabridged copies carry a small fee, currently around R75. Budget a few hundred rand for the commissioner of oaths, certified copies and the trip for your family representatives, and check at your office in case anything has changed.

If Home Affairs won't register it

If the registering officer isn't satisfied that a valid marriage exists, they can refuse. Anyone with a real interest in the matter, including a spouse, a child or a family member, can ask the registering officer to enquire into whether the marriage exists. If that fails, a court can order Home Affairs to register the marriage, or cancel a registration that should never have happened. At that point you need an attorney.

Your customary marriage certificate

Once the marriage is registered, Home Affairs issues a certificate of registration. It is prima facie proof that the marriage exists and of the details recorded in it, which means it will be accepted unless someone proves otherwise. Keep the original safe and make certified copies.

You will be asked for it more often than you'd think, for medical aid, a home loan, school forms, insurance, a visa or a spouse's estate. Embassies and some institutions want the full version with all the registered details, so it helps to understand the difference between an abridged and unabridged marriage certificate before you apply for copies. Registration is also the point where a wife who wants to take her husband's surname can start that process. Our guide on changing your surname to your married name lists everyone you need to notify.

Property: in community of property unless you sign an antenuptial contract

This is where customary marriages have changed most since 1998, mostly through the Constitutional Court.

Monogamous customary marriages

If you are one husband and one wife, your marriage is in community of property by default. Everything you each own, and every debt you each owe, falls into one joint estate, shared equally. That applies to marriages concluded after the Act started, and since the Constitutional Court's 2008 judgment in Gumede v President of the Republic of South Africa, it applies to older monogamous customary marriages too. Before Gumede, many older marriages were governed by customary rules that left the husband in control of family property. The court struck those rules down as discrimination against women.

Choosing an antenuptial contract

If you don't want community of property, you can sign an antenuptial contract (ANC) before the marriage, choosing either out of community of property with the accrual system or without it. The contract must be drawn up by a notary and registered at the Deeds Office. Timing matters here. In a customary marriage, it is not always obvious which day the marriage started, so sign the ANC well before lobola is finalised and the bride is welcomed, not after. Our guides to antenuptial contracts, the reasons to sign an antenuptial agreement and what an antenuptial contract costs cover the choices in detail.

Already married without one? Both spouses can apply to court together to change their property system, provided no one else's rights are prejudiced. It is more expensive and slower than doing it up front.

Polygamous customary marriages

Customary law allows a husband to have more than one wife, and the Act recognises those marriages. The rules are stricter, though.

• Court-approved contract. A husband in a customary marriage who wants to take a further wife must apply to court, at his own cost, for approval of a written contract regulating the future property system of all his marriages. His existing wife or wives must be joined to that application.
• The first wife's consent. In Mayelane v Ngwenyama (2013), the Constitutional Court held that under Xitsonga customary law, the consent of the existing wife is required for a valid further customary marriage. Without it, the later marriage was invalid.
• What if the contract is skipped? The Supreme Court of Appeal held in 2012 that failing to get the court-approved contract does not on its own make the further marriage invalid, but that marriage is then treated as out of community of property.
• Older polygamous marriages. After the 2017 Ramuhovhi judgment and the Recognition of Customary Marriages Amendment Act of 2021, the husband and each wife in a polygamous marriage concluded before the Act share equally in ownership and management of the marital property, rather than the husband controlling it alone.

Polygamous arrangements are where the law is most technical and most often litigated. If this applies to your family, see an attorney before the next marriage, not after it.

Customary and civil marriage: can you do both?

Yes, with one firm rule. You can only add a civil marriage with the same person.

Marrying each other twice

Plenty of couples hold lobola and a traditional ceremony, then a church or Home Affairs wedding weeks or months later. Section 10 of the Act allows a husband and wife in a customary marriage to marry each other under the Marriage Act, as long as neither of them has another customary spouse. Once you do, the civil marriage governs your relationship from then on, the marriage becomes monogamous, and it is in community of property unless you signed an ANC first. A civil wedding needs a marriage officer and two witnesses, and our civil ceremony FAQs explain how that day works.

Which order?

Most couples do the customary marriage first, because lobola traditionally opens the process and many families won't hold a church wedding until it is done. The law doesn't require that order. What it does forbid is going the other way with someone new.

What you cannot do

• A spouse in a customary marriage cannot enter into a civil marriage with someone else while the customary marriage exists.
• A spouse in a civil marriage cannot enter into a customary marriage with anyone, including a second wife.
• A civil marriage cannot be added to a polygamous customary marriage.

Breaking these rules doesn't create a second marriage. It creates a void one, and often a long fight over an estate.

Divorce and inheritance

Ending a customary marriage

A customary marriage can only be ended by a court, on the ground that it has broken down irretrievably. Returning lobola, a family meeting or sending the wife back to her parents does not end it in law, although family mediation can still play a role alongside the court process. The court has the same powers as in any divorce, including dividing property and making orders about children and maintenance. When dividing assets in a polygamous marriage, it must take the other wives' interests into account. After the divorce, update your marital status at Home Affairs with the final decree.

When a spouse dies

The Reform of Customary Law of Succession Act of 2009 means that when a spouse in a customary marriage dies without a will, the estate passes under the ordinary Intestate Succession Act. The surviving spouse inherits as a spouse, and in a polygamous marriage each surviving wife does. The old rule of male primogeniture, where the eldest son or male relative took everything, was struck down by the Constitutional Court in Bhe in 2004. A will is still the best way to make sure your wishes are followed, especially where there are several spouses or children from different relationships.

What is changing: the Marriage Bill

The Marriage Bill of 2023 would replace the Marriage Act, the Civil Union Act and the Recognition of Customary Marriages Act with a single law covering all marriages. Among other things, it would make 18 the minimum age with no exceptions and allow traditional leaders to be designated as marriage officers. It is still a Bill. Parliament's Home Affairs committee held public hearings across the provinces into early 2026, and the Bill has not been passed. Until it is, everything above remains the law.

A practical checklist for couples

1. Decide on your property system early. If you want an ANC, have it signed and registered before the marriage is concluded.
2. Agree lobola in writing, signed by both families' representatives, and keep a copy.
3. Complete the customary ceremonies, including the welcoming of the bride, in the form your families agree on.
4. Within three months, book a visit to Home Affairs with both families' representatives.
5. Get the representatives' affidavits commissioned at the police station before the visit, and certify their IDs.
6. Bring both spouses' IDs and copies, the lobola agreement and any photos or letters from the celebrations.
7. Collect your certificate and check every detail before you leave the counter.
8. Order an unabridged copy if you may need it for travel or emigration.
9. If you plan a white or civil wedding with each other, book your marriage officer and venue.
10. Update your wills, beneficiary nominations, medical aid and pension fund details.

Getting the right help

For most couples, registration is straightforward with the right paperwork and patient family members. Get proper advice when there is a dispute about whether a marriage exists, a further marriage is planned, a spouse has died without the marriage being registered, or you want to change your property system after the wedding. Our directory lists legal services for couples, and you can browse every supplier you need for the celebration in the full wedding vendor directory.